Redemption
by Mariamus
Summary: A femme returns to Autobot City to receive redemption for past crimes. With her follows a web of lies and tragedy. Will she get her redemption? PLEASE REVIEW! **UPDATED**
1. Broken

**A/N: **This is a story I've been working with on and off for a long time. I think the beginning of the story is approximately 5 yeas old, and the last words only a few minutes old.

Please forgive any plot-holes and mistakes, This was not really meant to be "put out there" but I figured I might as well.

Oh, and I've used Angelstarr's excellent idea about recognizing in this fic. It basically the same as soul mates, just… you can end up with many completors, and if you don't complete both completors will shut down and only the strongest will wake up. Just to clarify that…

**Chapter 1:**

**Broken…**

She looked at his body. So strong, and yet so weak.

How on earth had it come this far?

This had never been planned. Never been thought. Never in her wildest dreams had she thought she would sit in this situation.

Especially not when she had left.

So sad.

So very sad!

A sigh escaped her lips as she held his big hand. It was cold...

Funny. She looked at him and saw him.. It was him. But then again, it wasn't him at all. It was just an empty shell, something that was going to be shot out to space when the death toll had been calculated and the remains of all the fallen had been gathered.

He was dead! Everyone she loved was dead. And left back was a crowd of unknown faces. They had never seen her, and she didn't know them.

Her background. Her past was gone. And left in the emptiness was an uncertain future.

Another sigh was heard from her. Her time was almost over in the room. She had things to take care off.

She could hear his voice. The last words she had heard from him. They suddenly were as clear to her, as had he spoken them now.

"_If you walk out of that door, don't come back. Because if you leave, you're no longer my child!"_

Her reply hung in the air.

"_I haven't been a child for a long time!"_

Not even a goodbye. Just a slam with a door, and the vision of his optics, hurt and angry as they kept staring into her soul, burned into her mind. He was mad. She was mad. But now, she was no longer mad. She was sad and angry with herself! How could she have allowed this to happen?

She sighed and wished her human eyes for a moment. She wanted to be human again. She wanted to be 15 and feel his eyes rest on her as she lay on the sofa, pretending to sleep. Or sitting on his desk, watching silently as he worked with the reports or orders. She wanted him to tell her he was proud of her.

"Please tell me you still love me."

She whispered so quietly that no one could have heard her, even if they stood close by.

Liquid ran to her optics and the light dimmed to a darker blue in sadness. Of course there was no answer. They were on different sides of life and death.

She looked down on his hand. It was massive against her own. She had delicate feminine fingers. Fingers he designed to save her. She owed her entire design to his thoughts on how she should look like. She was his daughter. His design. A mix of him and the woman he wanted her to be. The adult she was becoming. She sighed again. She felt her strength running out of her. Her courage fading like a hot breath on a winter-morning. She was a child again. A scared five year old, facing the greatest disappointment. Betrayal. But this time, there were no arms of safety. No one to scoop her up and run away with her to a safe haven. No fatherfigure to comfort her and tell her she would be OK. She was alone. She had been alone for quite some time… But now she realized how lonesome she really was. She had always believed that she could return and beg for forgiveness. She could beg for the rest of her life. But she would never be forgiven. Cause he could never say a word anymore.

A chill went through her spine as realization hit her like a bolt from the sky. She got up and knew her time there was over. She removed her faceplate with a click and placed a soft kiss on his faceplate before she stood up and put her faceplate back, leaving the room.


	2. Late goodbye…

**Chapter 2:**

**Late goodbye…**

She walked down the halls and saw faces coming toward her. All the unknown faces. She looked around her and saw the dead bots around her. Her friends and family. Her past. She looked up again to see the unknown move closer.

A pink femme, a large red bot with fire painted onto his chest, and a huge blue, white and red bot. The one with the fire on his chest moved closer to her. She wanted to run. He spoke to her.

"Who are you?"

She looked at him with uncertainty in her optics.

"I'm no one!"

The big one stepped into the talk.

"I think I recognize you. I've seen your image in old personnel files. Despite the changes in your appearance, it's still clear who you are… You are Mariamus Prime."

She looked at him. She hadn't heard that name in years. She only called herself Maria. She wasn't a Prime. She looked at the big one and wanted to say something, but the femme talked before she could.

"Prime's daughter? But, Magnus, I thought she was dead!"

Magnus looked at the femme and was abut to say something, but was interrupted by Maria.

"No. I didn't die. Maybe my father would rather tell the world that I was dead, instead of the truth."

The red bot nodded to her.

"And what is the truth?"

Her eyes narrowed.

"None of your business! Who are you anyway?"

"Rodimus Prime."

He extended his hand but she didn't take it. She didn't know him and her years as a Con shone through.

She nodded.

"The new commander of the autobots, I presume?"

He nodded politely. Magnus stared at her strongly. She looked at him with her blue optics.

"Anything wrong?"

He nodded and pointed to the con-insignia on her chest. She looked at it and then up at Magnus. He looked stern.

"I suspect that is the problem you had with Optimus?"

She grinned.

"Clever bot. But I'm not here to cause a scene. It seems I was too late... I only have one more to talk to."

Two medics came walking down the hall pushing a gurney in front of them. Maria looked at the gurney and saw them rolling Prowl down to the morgue until they should be shot into space. She sighed as the two medics stopped.

"Rodimus? We found the ship Megatron used to breach security in. All the bots were killed by shots, not by the crash."

Rodimus nodded.

"How many?"

"Four. We're rolling them in now."

Rodimus nodded and turned as two more bots came with each their gurney. Mariamus watched as Ironhide was rolled past them. His head had been shot on and half of his face was missing. She winced by the sight of her old friend. She wanted to leave now and say goodbye to her love. The next gurney rolled by. She stopped the gurney by pushing her foot in front of the gurney. The medic growled.

"Hey!"

The entire hall went silent and Kup came around the corner, he stopped and watched the scene. Mariamus shook her head and looked into Ratchet's dead, gray optics and sighed. Mentally she was excusing. But a con never say sorry. Not even to the love of her life.

She looked at the others and removed her foot. She eyed each of them.

"I'll leave now!"

She pushed Rodimus out of her way and walked down the hall. He growled.

"Even though she's Prime's daughter, she sure doesn't act like him!"

Kup came over to the others.

"That's because she's not really his daughter!"

Rodimus turned to face Kup.

"What are you talking about?"

"She's only adopted. Her real father is Megatron. Rumors say that he is the reason she left. No one knows why, except Optimus. Maybe she hoped to change Megatron to the better."

Arcee stepped into the conversation.

"But why does she look like Optimus then?"

Kup smiled.

"It's a long story. Optimus build her the body. She has a human mother who was with Megatron for some time when they had the ability to morph to humans. So she was actually born human."

Magnus looked after the femme as she walked down the hall. He looked at the others and nodded to them.

"I'll see you later! I'm going to keep an eye on her."

He walked outside and saw the femme walking toward the quarters. He followed her and watched as she walked over to a door. It was the only room Optimus wouldn't allow to be touched or cleaned out. No one knew why the room was sealed off. The femme took a hold on the big planks and tore them away from the door and tapped the access code. The door opened and she walked in.


	3. Reminiscing…

**Chapter 3:**

**Reminiscing…**

Mariamus took in the smell in the room. She remembered the smell. Everything was as it used to be. She shut off her optics. And for a few blessed moments, she felt human again.

All the memories of her childhood came flooding back. The happy times when she was just a kid. The bedtime stories Optimus told her. The rows and the slamming of doors. The tears she had shed in this room… be it from a bruised knee as a kid, or a broken arm as a young woman. Optimus had always been there for her. Her dad…

Her optics flickered online and she felt the images of her sunny room fade away to the harsh reality of dusty quarters with a rank smell of decay, the broken dreams and scarred hearts that had become the essence of these rooms…

Magnus watched her from the door. She lingered in the middle of the room and just stood there for a few moments before she walked over to the door to her bedroom. Magnus walked in and something caught his attention. It was a frame with a picture. She was sitting on Ratchet's lap, kissing him on the cheek. He looked at it. Such a different display from the loving femme to the scarred and cold-hearted con that had arrived at their base.

"I loved him…"

He looked up and saw Mariamus standing in the doorway. She walked over and took the picture and looked at it. Then she put it down again. Exact same spot as the dusty marks showed. She looked at Magnus.

"What are you doing here?"

Magnus removed a cobweb from her shoulder.

"I could ask you the same thing."

She glared at him but paid him no answer. She removed her facemask and it crumbled into subspace.

Magnus studied her for a few brief seconds before she turned away. Trying to imagine if Optimus had built her in his image or if she looked like her human self.

She walked past him and out of the quarters. She made her way to Optimus office and broke open the door. She looked at the dusty office and took a step inside. Magnus followed her inside. Mariamus growled at him.

"Could you just leave me alone?"

Magnus shook his head.

"No, you're a con, and I have to make sure you don't steal anything."

Mariamus laughed. It sounded cold and evil in Magnus' ears.

"As if there was anything worth stealing!"

She tore open a drawer and messed through the papers. Magnus grabbed onto her arm.

"I can't allow that!"

Mariamus smiled to him in a way that made him feel uneasy, the lithe femme grabbed his wrist and wrung his arm around his back and pushed him against the wall. She pulled out a laser-blade and put it against his neck.

"Don't try to stop me."

She removed the blade and walked over to the desk again, resuming her task. She shut the drawer again and pulled open another one. Magnus slowly got to his feet. He had underestimated the femme. He took a step toward her to stop her, but then he saw her face. Her expression had turned from a stern look to one of agony. As if it pained her to mess through the drawers. She slammed the drawer shut and opened the last one. When she was done rummaging through it she shut it with an audible slam and started kicking the desk in anger.

She opened the file cabin and tore papers and files out. Then she walked out of the office. Magnus held to his abdomen and followed her. She walked into Prime's private quarters and was now rummaging through the drawers in his desk. She hadn't noticed him standing in the door, and when she apparently didn't find what she was searching for, she started kicking the wall, making huge dents in the silver metal. Magnus was about to step in when she turned around and searched the room for another option.

"Are you gonna be killed if you don't bring what you're looking for back?"

She shook her head.

"Then what?"

She didn't answer. Magnus was angered by the way she took liberties, yet intrigued to find out more about this… this daughter of Prime.

She grabbed the keyboard from Optimus' computer and tapped in the access code. Miraculously it still worked. She looked through the private files and found an executable file named "Maria". She opened it and a new directory opened. She looked at the files in the new directory and found a big directory of picture files with her, and a long diary. She opened it and started reading…


	4. Captive…

**Chapter 4:**

**Captive…**

"_Today, it has been one year since Maria left us. I haven't heard about her, or from her. I wish I could find her and tell her to come back. But she would turn me down. She would never come back. Not the way we parted. I still remember her optics as she walked out of the door. Angry, flaming… She looked so much like her father. It frightened me... I miss my daughter. She might be Megatron's in blood, but she will always be mine by heart."_

Mariamus shut down the diary and uploaded it to her data pad. She deleted all the files about her and turned to Magnus who was blocking her path. He looked at her sternly.

"I can't let you leave. I saw you upload information to your data-pad. What was it?"

She pushed by him.

"None of your business!"

Magnus grabbed her arm and pulled her back.

"It is my business! For all I know you could be stealing vital information!"

"Let… go… I'm warning you!"

Her threat was that of real malice and hate. Magnus was taken aback by the intensity in her cool, almost monotonous, tone. He didn't even realize he had let go of her before he saw he walk out of the door. He hurried after her, pushing the alarm button on his way out.

The entire base came to life with a howling screech caused by the alarms. Mariamus turned her head and saw him coming after her. To his surprise, she just ran, made it for the exit so she could transform. Her boosters were already heating up for takeoff. Magnus screamed.

"Halt! Stop right there!"

She didn't stop. She just ran faster, giving Magnus a real run for his money. Magnus' legs were aching from the strain, and Mariamus was nearly at the exit. When her body emerged into the light, Magnus saw two objects being rammed into her from either side of the exit. Magnus stopped as he heard her scream and drop to the ground, rolling a few good meters before she lay still on the ground.

"We got her!"

Magnus caught his breath and smiled to the two bots. Hey were carrying vibration emitter staffs. One jab was enough to immediately immobilize a transformer of a reasonable size, and Mariamus had received two jabs on the highest setting. She would be immobilized for hours.

Magnus called for backup, mobilizing a few of the bots to set up a containment cell for her. When she woke up, she would have a great deal of explaining to do…

"Alright… She should wake up in just a few moments. Her systems just need to boot up."

"Good… Make sure the cage is secure. I don't want her to escape before we figure out what it was she stole."

"Don't worry; the bars have been set on the highest voltage… Not even Unicron could break out of this cage."

Mariamus looked up at the ceiling. The familiar hum of the cage bid her welcome to reality in all its glory. The electric hum brought back memories…

"_Put her in a cage! I'll deal with her later."_

"_Yes sir…"_

"_But I didn't come here to fight you! I came here to tell you…"_

_He walked off, not listening to her words. She dodged Starscream's hands and yelled at him."_

"_Father! Listen to me!"_

_He stopped and looked at her._

"_What did you say?"_

_Starscream put his hands around her, caging her in his hands._

"_Shall I kill her for her insolence, oh mighty Megatron?"_

"_No… Leave us."_

"Well, it looks like you finally decided to grace us with your presence. How are you feeling?"

She looked at Magnus who sat in front of the cage, looking smug.

"I will not speak with you. Get me someone I actually recognize."

Offended, Magnus decided that two could play that game.

"I am afraid many of your… old friends… have perished in this war. Thanks to your kinship."

Mariamus chuckled and got up off the floor. She walked close to the bars and looked at Magnus.

"Let me tell you something… Only for your ears."

Intrigued, he walked closer but not close enough for her to be able to reach him without frying her circuits on the bars. She leaned closer.

"Did you know that if someone touches an electric fence while holding onto someone, they don't get the shock?"

Magnus did a double take as Mariamus threw herself at the bars and grabbed onto him. Magnus stood frozen as the electricity surged through his body. It felt like an eternity before she jumped back and released him. She watched him drop to the floor as the medics ran to him.

"Get me someone who isn't as gullible as you, and I may even consider telling my tale."

Magnus groaned in pain, the electric surge still throbbing in his wires and his scrambled system.


	5. Old friends…

**Chapter 5:**

**Old friends…**

"Well, if it isn't the most beautiful femme to have ever graced our ranks. What are you doing in a cell?"

Mariamus looked up and smiled.

"Jazz you old bucket of rust! How've you been?"

Magnus watched the reunion with as much excitement as watching paint dry. He frowned.

"She's stolen information from Optimus Prime's computer… She won't tell me what it is."

"You have got to be kidding me! Mariamus, is that true?"

She nodded slowly, watching his face change into a disappointed expression.

"I stole this information because I don't want everyone to read what he had to say about me… I'm not an autobot anymore, nor am I decepticon…"

"What happened?"

Mariamus looked at the floor.

"I sought him out. And I decided to join forces with him because I hoped I could somehow change his opinion of autobots… maybe even push some peace talks into action."

Jazz sat down in front of the cell.

"I guess Optimus didn't understand that…"

Mariamus looked at her old friend; he looked scarred from the recent battle… The one that had cost her the life of her father.

"No. I tried to explain it to him… But he wouldn't listen. He can… could… be really stubborn."

Jazz nodded, watching her move her foot over a crack in the floor.

"Tell me more…"

Mariamus looked up, staring directly at the wall behind Jazz.

"_I don't know what you think you are trying to do, but my daughter died years ago! She fell into the ocean at our base and drowned!"_

_Maria swallowed, shaking her head, although Megatron's face was cold as ice, his eyes told her how much it pained him to say it._

"_No… I didn't die… I was told you didn't want me there… You weren't there to help me. You had gone to Cybertron. You told me you'd be gone for two weeks. I remember even though I was only 5 years old."_

_Megatron threw his fists into the desk._

"_Lies! All lies! I don't know how you came to know that, but I will not be fooled by Autobot lies!"_

"_Then test me! Draw blood and test me!"_

"_I will draw blood don't you worry about that!"_

_Megatron called a laser knife from subspace and moved to stab her. Maria didn't move and he stopped in his tracks as he was mere inches from her. The laser knife glowed in front of her face, _

_Emitting heat that was almost unbearable. _

_He finally removed the knife and pushed the button to the intercom._

"_Soundwave! I need a blood sample from this human."_

_Maria lay in the energy cage, waiting for the test results to come back. Megatron was looking at her every now and then. Maria just stared back at him until he finally spoke._

"_Blue eyes… How very autobot."_

"_I got the blue eyes from mother. You told me she died after I was born."_

_He turned away from her as the door opened, revealing Soundwave in the doorway. He looked at Megatron as he entered._

"_It's a match, Megatron."_

"But if he knew, why did he kill you?"

Mariamus looked down again.

"Megatron didn't kill me per se… You remember the eyes… The blue eyes I had as a human. Do you remember when Optimus said that I had en eye infection that had turned my left eye brown?"

Jazz nodded.

"I didn't… The eye was a gift of sorts…"

"_Maria! Duck and cover!"_

"_But Ratchet is…"_

"_He will be fine, don't worry!"_

"_No! He's hurt!"_

"_Maria, get down!"_

_She jumped out of the ditch and ran over to Ratchet. He smiled to her weakly._

"_You shouldn't have come here… Run back to Optimus!"_

"_No! Let me fix you!"_

_She dug her hands into the scratch wound and pulled out the damaged wire. She looked at Ratchet._

"_Shut down, I need to reconnect these wires…"_

_Ratchet did as she suggested and Maria reassembled the damaged cable, tying some duct-tape around it._

_Optimus shouted._

"_Maria, heads up!"_

_She looked up, seeing the enormous bird that had caused the havoc. It looked like it was made of stone and it had two sets of wings, each pair flapping out of sync, giving it a strange uneven way of flying. Optimus fired his blaster to scare the beast away. He hit a rock near the bird-like creature and it howled and flew away. Optimus got up from the ground and ran to them. Maria was lying curled up next to Ratchet, squirming and screaming. Optimus picked her up._

"_Maria?"_

_She turned her head at him, holding to her left eye. Blood was flooding out of it and it looked like a piece of the rock had come off from the blast and pierced her eye._

"_We've removed the rock, but it looks like some sort of aggressive bacteria on the stone had infected her more than we though, we had to take out the eye to keep it from spreading."_

"_What are out options?"_

"_A transplant… We've looked into the possibility of giving her a mechanical eye, but we doubt her brain will be able to interpret the input correctly… But we need a match, and I'm not even sure earth has the technology to transplant an eye…"_

"_Use mine…"_

_Optimus turned his head at the sound of the familiar voice coming from the door._

"_Megatron?"_

"_Use my eye."_

"_But you're…"_

"_A robot? Yes, but who says all of us have lost the knowledge of how to become human?"_

"That still doesn't explain how you died."

"I'm getting to it, Magnus. If you want to hear this, you'll have to shut up and sit down."


	6. Dead love…

**Chapter 6:**

**Dead love…**

"_Absolutely not! How can you be this insane Ratchet? She's human for Primus' sake!"_

"_But Optimus… I love her! And it's not your place to decide. She's old enough to make that decision on her own!"_

"_No! Ratchet, I don't know what you're thinking, but how can you expect this to even last! You can't recognize, you can't complete with her! You are two different species! You say you love her more than anything, but what happens when you meet your first completor? You will need to complete or one of you die. And what do you think Maria will think of that?"_

"_But, Prime…"_

"_No buts! I cannot and I will not give my permission!"_

"I guess he thought it was the right decision… But that doesn't mean that we thought the same thing."

"What happened?"

Mariamus looked at Jazz. She could see that he was shocked about it. Everyone from the old days knew that Ratchet and Mariamus had been an item, but not many knew that they had been in love when Maria was just human.

"We ran away… Me and Ratchet stole a freighter and took off. It took about two months for Optimus to find us… But by then things had changed radically."

"How?"

"The eye my father had given me turned out to be both a gift and a curse…"

_Ratchet watched as the shuttle landed on the grassland. He stood there, rigid, waiting for Optimus to emerge. He knew both he and Maria were in more trouble than they could even fathom. Hell, Optimus could be mad enough to have him dismantled. But none of that mattered at the time._

_Optimus stepped out of the shuttle and his entire posture, the way he walked, even his aura was that of pure fury. Ratchet took a step forward._

"_Optimus… Before you say anything, I…"_

"_Where is she?"_

_Ratchet sighed and looked at the crystal cave they had made their home. He looked as Optimus passed him._

"_Optimus… Listen to me."_

_Optimus turned his head at Ratchet._

"_I'm taking my daughter home, and I'm shipping you back to Cybertron, and I'll make damn sure you will never see her again!"_

"_Optimus, listen to me! Maria is sick!"_

_Optimus turned to Ratchet, a brief flash of horror tracing his optics._

"_What? How sick?"_

"_Sick enough to understand that I need to follow you home…"_

_Optimus turned to look at his daughter. He took a step back in shock. The eye she had gotten implanted had turned black and looked dead. The veins in her left side of her face had turned black and were protruding through her skin, which had turned a sickly gray, it was tracing down her neck and Optimus could see the marks on her left hand too. He moved over to her and knelt down, looking at her._

"_By Primus… What happened to you?"_

_She shook her head and looked at Ratchet._

"_We don't know…"_

"_It looks like the bacteria that had infected her original eye had spread faster than we thought. We don't know what to counter it with…"_

"_What do you mean?"_

_The doctor turned to Optimus._

"_We have to study the bacteria and find out if we have anything to fight it with… But time is of the essence, we don't know how fast this thing spreads, and if we can't work fast enough…"_

_Optimus looked at Maria. She just nodded slowly like she had already come to terms with what the doctor was saying._

"_Get to work then…"_

_He turned to Maria and put his finger under her chin, lifting her scarred head up to look at him._

"_I'll find a way to save you…"_

"So he built you a robotic body?"

"Not right away… He had to perfect a method of copying the human brain, basically capturing the human soul in a bottle and inject it into a dead robot… That took all his time… Time I didn't have."

"_Optimus… I think you should put that down and talk to your daughter… She needs you right now."_

"_I don't have time… I need to finish this! If I don't…"_

"_Optimus..."_

"_Go away!"_

_Ratchet returned to the medical chambers and sat down next to the bed. The disease had spread like wildfire, now covering her entire body. She turned her head and looked at him._

"_No time today?"_

_He shook his head._

"_I understand… I just don't want him beating himself up about it when I'm gone…"_

"_Hey… Don't talk like that. We don't know how much time…"_

"_I do… It won't be long. I can feel this thing eating away at my body. I'm lucky if I survive through this week."_

"I remember that… I remember Optimus practically barred himself in his room..."

"He was there when I died... I remember my mouth was too dry for me to say or do anything. I remember I wanted to cry, but there was no fluid left in me."

Magnus looked at them, his optics turned at Mariamus.

"Were you in pain?"

Mariamus turned at Magnus and held his optics with hers.

"Yes, but I couldn't express it, but I guess Optimus could see it in what was left of my eyes."

"Why didn't you get something to kill the pain?"

"_Can't you do something to stop the pain?"_

_Optimus looked at the doctor that was standing next to Maria._

"_We've tried, but we can't get through her skin, it's like stone, every needle we've tried broke before it got through the skin. We tried giving her something breathable and drinkable, but it's like nothing hangs on. Her skin is flexible, but rock hard, and I'm guessing her internal organs are the same. That's what's causing the pains; she's turning into stone! I think her brain is being robbed of oxygen very slowly. Her organs are still flexible like her skin, but they're strangulating her blood flow and everything else."_

_Optimus watched his daughter as she blinked, trying to speak. Optimus knelt down and watched her._

"_What's happening?"_

_The doctor checked her vitals and blinked a few times._

"_I think… I think she's dying…"_

_Maria turned her good eye at Optimus and looked at him for a few seconds. He took her hand and shook his head._

"_I'm sorry… It's my fault."_

_She didn't respond, her pupils dilated a bit, but she couldn't answer him. Her hand fell to the bed and Optimus looked at the doctor._

"_Now…"_

_The doctor moved over with the device Optimus had constructed. He placed it over her head and pressed the cold metal against her forehead._

"_I hope this thing works Optimus…"_

"_It will… Don't worry… It will…"_

_The machine hummed and gave off a spark. The doctor checked the readings and nodded to Optimus. He then moved over to Maria and listened to her heart, checking her pulse and her brainwaves._

"_She's dead…"_

"Why didn't he use the machine earlier? Spared you the pain?"

Jazz nodded.

"Yeah? Optimus never gave us much info on it. Why didn't he?"

"Because the machine didn't work like that. It had to capture the final brainwaves that would lead to the rest of the information. Almost like rolling up a long thread, if you get the middle, all the information would become scrambled together, it would have made my robot form useless, or even insane. Also, the human soul couldn't be captured unless it was on its way out of the body."

"I remember your funeral… Only Optimus, Ratchet and a few others were allowed to attend… I think it was mainly because Megatron was there too."

"I didn't know he cared to attend… maybe I wronged him on that…"

"How did you end up as a Decepticon anyway?"

"Long story… I'll tell you about that another time. Leave me."

Mariamus turned her back to them and listened to them as they left the room. Magnus protested, but Jazz knew that she wouldn't tell them more before she was ready.


	7. Second in command

**Chapter 7:**

**Second in command.**

As soon as they had left, Mariamus opened her datapad and found the information she was imprisoned for having stolen. She closed the main screen and projected the text to her optics.

"_I caught news that Maria has been promoted to second in command of the Decepticons. I'm sure Starscream is angered by this. Soundwave is probably still following orders and has no objections… But why is she accepting this? Why? I taught my daughter to respect life and the rights of all sentient beings… My daughter, second in command of our enemies… I cannot fathom it. Why did she turn from me and went to him? I have so many questions, but no one will be able to get a message through to her. She doesn't contact me, and I can't contact her. I'm sure Megatron is exhilarated by this. He has beaten me by taking away the most precious thing I have. It gives him no power, but it hurts my spark more than anything, and he must know how it feels… It feels like a part of my spark is gone…"_

Mariamus turned her optics from the text and stared at the wall. She remembered that day…

_Megatron sat in his throne room with an assembly of warriors gathered in front of him. The darkness loomed in the distance as the sun fought to bathe the land with its final weak rays of light. Starscream was standing in the corner, his arms crossed like he didn't give a damn about the whole world._

_Mariamus stood next to Soundwave among the other assembled cons. Megatron just stared at them until the sun finally gave up and all light disappeared for a short moment before the automatic light system kicked in and bathed the room in a sharp blue halogen light._

"_I've ordered your weak hides here to tell you that I am promoting a new second in command to me."_

_Starscream turned his head at Megatron, but kept his mouth shut as he let his arms drop to his sides. The assembly just got a lot more interesting to him._

_Mariamus turned her head to Soundwave. She knew he would be degraded because of this. His face was emotionless as always, but she offered a pat on his shoulder as a comfort. Megatron's approval meant much to Soundwave, so he, if he had any emotion left inside, would take it hard. Soundwave moved turned his head and looked at her, his red eyes lighting up a bit. He nodded and turned his head back, looking at Megatron._

"_I've decided to give the position to my next of kin… My daughter Mariamus."_

_Mariamus snapped her optics away from Soundwave and looked at Megatron. A thousand objections screaming in her head, but she wasn't the first to voice her objections._

"_This is objectionable, Megatron! She's an Autobot!"_

_Several of the Decepticons chimed in, voicing their disdain at his order. Megatron rose from his throne and roared as he made his way down to Mariamus._

"_This is my order, and by Primus it will be as I order!"_

_Starscream raised his voice._

"_You have gone insane on your old days! I suggest new leadership is needed!"_

_A few of the more bold Decepticons nodded and pulled their weapons, trigger-happy by the idea of a fight. _

_Megatron pushed aside the first few cons that blocked his path. A couple of the trigger-happiest grabbed onto Mariamus, pulling her through the crowd, screaming for justice to be served. None moved to object, but didn't join in either. The crowd parted like the red sea at the sight of Megatron and his furious aura. He raised his cannon and fired two times._

_A dead silence fell over the room as the two cons that had dragged Mariamus through the room fell to their knees, their heads obliterated by the powerful rays of Megatron's cannon. Mariamus just stood still, awaiting Megatron's instructions. He stalked over to her, checking her quickly before turning to the rest of the room._

"_This will be the fate of anyone who further opposes my orders!"_

_Soundwave walked over to them and the three of them left the room. Starscream still stood at the wall, his fists clutched to keep his rage from escaping. How dared she… that little Autobot bitch. How dared she come and steal his position He was sure he would have gotten the position had it not been for her.. She would pay for it… yes she would pay for it._

Mariamus woke up by the sound of the electric bars being shut down. Ultra Magnus opened the door and looked at her. Behind him stood two Autobots as backup.

"Come with me. It's time for you to recharge."

Mariamus got up from the uncomfortable position on the bench and gracefully moved out of the cell. Magnus stopped her.

"Hold it. I need to put a restraining device on you."

He lifted his arms and clamped a collar around her neck. When she felt the cold metal grasping her neck, she grabbed Ultra Magnus and spun him around, jerking his head back in a painful motion. He gasped, dropping to the floor when she kicked him behind the knees, dislocating his knee joints. The two backup Autobots watched her in horror. They wouldn't have believed that the femme was able to incapacitate a warrior as big as Ultra Magnus. She released him and he dropped like a ripe apple from a branch. Mariamus stood there for a few moments as she came to the realization of what she had done. It had all been reflexes for her, old habits die hard.

"Don't ever do that again without giving me a warning! I may snap your head off next time."

It didn't come off as a threat, merely a justifiable warning.

"I'll take it into consideration."

Ultra Magnus pushed his joint back into place and got up shakily. It seemed to him that she hadn't exactly wanted to harm him, but had done so out of instinct.


	8. Prime words…

**Chapter 8:**

**Prime words…**

"She did what?"

"She attacked me when I put the collar on her."

"Why?"

"I'm not sure, Bumblebee. It felt like she just did it out of old habit..."

"I guess that makes sense. I don't think an Autobot, daughter of Megatron or not, is all too welcome in the Decepticon ranks."

_Mariamus walked down the corridors of the Decepticon base. Megatron had removed her Autobot insignia from her chest plate and replaced it with a dark red Decepticon icon. He had spoken of a completely new paint job, to remove her resemblance to Optimus Prime. She had rejected the idea, much to his dismay. She liked her color scheme… She liked looking like her dad. _

_She turned a corner and entered her quarters, removing her face plate and watched it crumble into sub space._

"_Such a beautiful face, why hide it from view when you could easily whore the rest of the Decepticons to like you!"_

_She turned swiftly, eyeing the pair of red eyes that glared at her from the darkness of the corner._

"_Starscream! What do you think you are doing in my quarters?"_

_He chuckled, moving out of the corner toward her._

"_I simply came to reclaim what is mine. You took my position as second in command! All I had to do was to get rid of Soundwave, and the position would be mine. Now I have two I need to eliminate! You complicate my plans, autobot!"_

"_Watch your audio components Starscream; you're talking to a superior!"_

"_Superior!" He snorted, circling her like a vulture would a prey. _

"_You will never be superior to me! You're an autobot weakling, and I'll snap your head off like an antenna off a service-droid!"_

_He lunged at her, his hands grasping her neck, knocking her entire frame against the wall behind her. She groaned, but got no rest before he threw her again, this time pressing her down on her desk. She grabbed the crystal that served as a desk ornament and bashed it against his head. He lost his balance and roared in anger when he realized that she had managed to crack his right optic._

"_Damn you! I'll have you yet!"_

_He threw himself after her, firing his jets as he took off. He knocked her down into the floor and locked his hands around her neck._

"_You little bitch! Nothing to hit me with on the floor! Nothing to help you now!"_

_He released her when her optics started to flicker. He grabbed the energon dagger he had brought along and raised his arms, stabbing her in the chest two times before a blunt force struck him in the right side, knocking him off the bleeding femme._

"_Commander? Are you functional?"_

"_I… function..."_

_Her voice components had been severely damaged during the attack, and her chest plate had been ripped open, leaking a thick mix of energon and oil._

_Soundwave pushed the emergency button on the wall, calling the guards. He picked up the femme and carried her out of the room, leaving the debilitated Starscream to be picked up by the guards._

Time passed by, slow as dirt. The thrill of the Autobot gone Decepticon prisoner had died down, and she no longer felt like an animal at the zoo, as the constant stares from the curious troops had slowly died down. Her first visitor in a long time, apart from the occasional guard that would lead her to the recharge-station, was none other than the new Autobot Commander.

"Care to explain why you attacked Ultra Magnus?"

Mariamus looked at the red bot. Golden flames were painted across his chest and she sucked her breath in to cool her wires. He was carrying a matrix in his chest. She could feel it pulsating in his chest. He studied her for a moment.

"Well?"

"He didn't give me a proper warning, and I don't like getting objects clamped around my neck without proper warning. Had he explained what he was going to do, I would not have attacked him."

Rodimus nodded slowly.

"Why the violent approach?"

"It's in my blood."

"No, I mean, why did you react that way?"

"I was attacked and strangled by Starscream once. I don't know much about how you react to that kind of attacks, but as my mind is technically still human, I get…"

"Traumatized? We get that too. Although I'm sure you get a little crazier than the rest of us, with your human mind and your con blood."

"Are you trying to intimidate me? Make me feel guilty? You won't succeed; I will break you before you've even budged me."

"Is that so?"

Mariamus let out a chuckle before leaning forward and whispering to Rodimus.

"You can't even begin to imagine the things you tell me by just sitting there. I know the rules, to be a true Prime, you need a Matrix. Yours is the Matrix of leadership, it makes you stronger, bigger, more agile. But you… You have doubts. Did the matrix choose correctly?"

His eyes narrowed. He swallowed, leading coolant to his circuits. He wouldn't let her see how right she was.

"I don't have to listen to your insults."

He was about to get up when Mariamus barked at him.

"Sit down! You started it, I'll finish it!"

The commanding tone was much like the one Optimus used when correcting a soldier. Rodimus found himself sitting down again.

"That's a good Autobot. Or are you really?"

Her blue optics flared, her matrix probing his, digging out the dirt on him. He didn't even realize what was going on. Her Matrix was one of Wisdom. It made her stronger and more intelligent, and since the Matrix of Wisdom had the ability to pull information from every living source to make her and itself stronger, she could almost read his mind.

"You have doubts. Why did the Matrix choose such a blatantly incompetent Autobot such as yourself? To rectify your actions against the autobots, or simply because you were the only autobot available?"

"I haven't done anything to the Autobots! And to hear such nonsense from you, you were the one who switched sides."

Mariamus laughed out loud.

"Haven't done anything wrong? You carry the full responsibility for the death of Optimus Prime! You had the audacity to think that you and you alone could take out Megatron, leader of the Decepticons! Your actions were those of impudence and your foolhardiness cost Optimus his life!"

Rodimus felt the coolant drain from his head, he was cold to the circuits, and she had put the exact words to his feelings. He tried to open his mouth to speak, but she just continued.

"And why did the Matrix choose you? Because you were worthy? Because you had the bravery to stand up to Galvatron? No… It chose you simply because you were there. The job of your matrix is to keep the Autobot race alive, and to kill the threats against our race. Had it not chosen you, it would have gone against its primary function. You are not worthy, you were just available."

Rodimus turned his head away from her. He didn't want to listen. He didn't want to be a part of the conversation any more.

"Why do you think Optimus appears in your dreams?"

Rodimus stood up shakily and tried to sound calm and collected.

"You.. You are wrong…"

He turned to leave.

"Just keep telling yourself that. You will never be the leader Optimus Prime was. Never."

Rodimus hurried outside, he felt sick and cold. It was as if she had peered directly into his soul and taken all his doubts, affirming them all. He moved like a zombie across the base and stood in front of Optimus Prime's monument.

"Why do I keep seeing you in my dreams, Optimus? Are you telling me I'm not the leader you were?"

Rodimus sighed heavily, still gazing at the statue.

"I already know that, Optimus... I always have."


	9. Con love…

**Chapter 9:**

**Con love…**

Mariamus leaned back against the wall, shutting off her optics, and for the first time since the attack, she opened Optimus' diary again.

"_I'm going to Cybertron today. This will probably be the last update in a long time… When I return to earth I will update the journal with whatever thought I have written down about her. Should something happen to me, I wish she will find this. At least so she knows that I love her._

_Sometimes I get angry with her. Nobody can change the monster Megatron is, and all she is doing is keeping herself from her real family. The family that loves and supports her."_

Mariamus banged her head against the wall. Optimus was wrong. Megatron was not all the monster everyone thought he was. He had protected her, kept her safe… Maybe he had even loved her… Decepticons, prone to hate and violence were not all incapable of feeling love…

_Her optics came online slowly, and for a while, everything was out of focus._

"_Will she be alright?"_

"_Of course Megatron… Starscream has been repaired and fitted with a shock collar. He's screaming in the containment cells right now."_

"_Good… That will teach him a lesson."_

"_You don't want him killed?"_

"_No. I will do worse. I'll assign him as my daughter's personal servant for the rest of his life."_

_She turned her head to see him sitting by her side. He looked at her as he noticed her moving._

"_I see you are awake. How do you feel?"_

"_I feel good. Where is Soundwave?"_

"_He is administering the amount of voltage applied to Starscream."_

_She smiled to him._

"_I doubt he'll go easy on him."_

"_I instructed him not to."_

"_Must I stay here? I still have assignments to do."_

"_That's my girl! You can leave med-bay if you feel up to it."_

_Mariamus was buried in paperwork when the buzzer to her door interrupted a string of mathematical sequences she was trying to calculate._

"_Enter."_

_She looked up as the door swooshed open. Soundwave entered and stood in the doorway._

"_Are you in good health, commander?"_

_She nodded._

"_Yes… thanks to you."_

"_It is my duty to protect you."_

_Mariamus got up from the chair and walked over to him._

"_But does it not bother you that Megatron assigned me as second in command? You could have just walked out, let Starscream finish the job and let him take the fall for it… You could have been second in command again…"_

"_It is my duty to obey Megatron's orders… Megatron's orders were…"_

"_But he would never know…"_

"_I have to obey Megatron's orders…"_

"_Do you always act on the orders you are given? Do you never do anything because you want to? Because you… and only you… feel you have to?"_

"… _I… I…"_

"_I take that as a yes, you do actually have feelings behind that mask of yours."_

_He nodded slowly and pushed the button to close the door behind him, and then turning his head at her._

"_I was angered when I saw him attacking you."_

_Mariamus was taken aback by the sudden outlet._

"_I do not want to see you hurt, Mariamus."_

_She nodded slowly._

"_Alright…"_

_He put his hands up, leading them to her face, he took off her face mask and sighed._

"_I do not have ulterior motives for this… I do not wish to betray you any more than I want to betray Megatron. Although, to some extent I think I am betraying him now."_

_Mariamus watched him, puzzled as he removed his own face mask. She was surprised to see that it was indeed removable. She had never seen him without it, and he never mentioned that it was indeed a battle mask. He dropped the face masks and put his hands on her shoulders._

"_I do not wish to harm you."_

"_I trust you enough to know you will not try anything funny with me."_

"_Funny?"_

"_I mean, you will not harm me…"_

"_Indeed not…"_

_He pulled her closer, moving his arms around her back as he leaned down and kissed her._


	10. The usurper…

**Chapter 10:**

**The usurper…**

"Mariamus?"

She turned her head to look at Jazz who had interrupted her.

"What are you thinking about? You looked out of it."

"Not all cons are just ruthless killers, Jazz…"

"What do you mean?"

"I… loved him… I still do I guess. But he is different. Everyone changed during the Unicron wars…"

"Loved who?"

"Never mind, my friend… I doubt you would understand… Besides, you and Ratchet were friends."

Jazz nodded and sat down.

"Why did you leave the Decepticons?"

Mariamus smiled a bit.

"I left after… after the return of Megatron… Megatron in his new form. Galvatron…"

She looked as If the name of Galvatron brought her pain and distaste. A disgusted look tracing her features for a second.

"Tell me what happened…"

"I didn't join the war effort against you, I refused to do it. I know Megatron was disappointed in me, but I think he understood why I couldn't do it..."

"So you stayed behind?"

"Yes… I stayed at the Decepticon base on Cybertron… Megatron told me they had to make a run for earth to get more energon, and Soundwave told me he would protect my father…"

"_But, it's just a run for energon! What do you mean protect him?"_

"_You never know what will happen if we encounter Autobot resistance…"_

_Mariamus looked at him for a long while. She knew something was up. Even Starscream had been taken from his duties as her personal servant to join the so-called energon run._

"_Be careful…"_

"_Affirmative…"_

"I waited for a long time… waiting for them to return… When they did, it wasn't as expected."

"What do you mean?"

"Starscream had tossed Megatron from the shuttle and usurped the position as leader."

"_Astrotrain has returned!"_

_Mariamus looked up from her calculations as several Decepticon troops stormed down the hallway, cheering and hooting by the prospect of seeing their leader victorious. Mariamus had already heard the rumors that the energon run was no more than a vicious attack on Autobot City. She rose from her chair and made her way to Megatron's office, meaning to question him on why he decided to tell her a lie, and not the truth about his mission._

_She sat in the chair in front of his desk and waited. It didn't take too long before the door was opened and she could hear footsteps closing in on her._

"_Father…"_

"_Guess again sweet cheeks!"_

_Mariamus turned in the chair when she heard the familiar high pitched voice of Starscream._

"_How dare you…"_

_He slapped her, knocking her off the chair. He stepped on her back, pinning her to the floor._

"_Damn you Starscream! When Megatron sees this…"_

"_Megatron is dead! I personally threw him out of the shuttle. He's been converted to space-scrap."_

_He leaned forward, malice thick on his voice._

"_And I have some payback for the months of humiliation you have put me through… Autobot!"_

_Starscream pushed the button to lock the door._

"What did he do to you?"

"I would rather not discuss it… the details are fuzzy to me. All I remember is pain and screaming… He stripped me of my weapons and my dignity. He didn't stop until I was lying bruised and battered on the floor. Then he hauled me into the main hall to get me to renounce my title as heiress to the Decepticon throne… Promised me that the pain he had served to me was a mere fraction of what he'd hand me if I didn't…"

"Did you do it?"

"Yes…"

"_I renounce my title given to me by your former Commander. And I relinquish the title to Starscream…"_

_Soundwave watched from the sideline, shaking his head in disbelief. Mariamus stumbled off the podium and made her way over to him. He took her down to the med-bay and cleaned her up._

"_What happened?"_

"_Starscream had us vote if we should abandon the dead and dying… Megatron was among those to be thrown from the shuttle…"_

_Mariamus sighed._

"_And now Starscream has the command... It's going to be easy for the Autobots to win now."_

_She chuckled a bit, and to her surprise, Soundwave did the same._

"_Let's go watch the comedy show Starscream will set up for his… coronation."_

_Mariamus and Soundwave made their way to the coronation, watching from the sidelines as Starscream continued his show._

_Everyone stepped aside as a ship barged through the hall, putting a stop to Starscream's show._

"_Who disrupts my coronation!"_

_The ship opened, and a purple Decepticon jumped from the shuttle, making his way through the hall._

"_Coronation, Starscream? This is bad comedy!"_

_Starscream stared in disbelief at the newcomer._

"_Megatron…? Is that you?"_

_The newcomer growled angrily._

"_Here's a hint!"_

_He transformed into some type of cannon and fired a ray at Starscream. He froze, his circuits sizzling before he burned out and fell. The crown rolling down the steps._

_The newcomer transformed and stepped on it, crushing the crown under his feet._

"_Will anyone else attempt to fill his shoes?"_

"_What did he say his name was?"_

_The newcomer shouted out his name, striking fear in everyone who had for a mere second thought of opposing him._

"_Galvatron!"_


	11. Betrayal…

**Chapter 11:**

**Betrayal…**

"How could you follow him? Galvatron is insane…"

"I know… I didn't like him from the first second I laid eyes on him… I'm not even sure if he really is Megatron. He sure didn't act like him."

"What do you mean?"

_All the Decepticons raised their hands, hailing the new leader._

_Mariamus and Soundwave stood at the sideline. Galvatron saw them and made his way to them. He looked coolly at Soundwave._

"_You… You betrayed me!"_

_Soundwave shook his head._

"_I was positive you would return to lead us again. No doubt in my mind that Starscream's reign would be short-lived."_

_Galvatron nodded and turned his gaze at Mariamus._

"_Follow me."_

_She did as he said, following him to his office where he locked the door behind them._

"_Mariamus Prime…"_

_She nodded._

"_Father?"_

_He turned around grabbing her by the shoulders and throwing her against the wall._

"_Wrong. I am no longer your father! I am bigger, faster, better! I am the ultimate Decepticon! No one can match my strength!"_

_Mariamus writhed under his painful grasp._

"_Let go of me!"_

"_Since when are you giving out orders here?"_

"_Please!"_

_He grinned, a wicked smile spreading on his lips. He released one of her arms and ripped off her facemask._

"_Such a pretty display. Femmes are such a rare thing. I'll make the most of you."_

_Mariamus stared at him in disbelief as he leaned closer, kissing her roughly. She gathered all the strength she had and pushed him off._

"_No! Let me go!_

_She kicked him hard over the knee, and as he buckled over, she knocked him across the head, knocking him out cold. Mariamus grabbed her face mask from his hand and opened the door. She couldn't stay._

"Eww! He kissed you?"

"Yes… I've never felt as violated in my entire life. No amount of denial has made me able to forget what it felt like. Ugh…"

She shuddered.

"_Soundwave!"_

_He turned as he heard Mariamus call out to him._

"_I need a ship. I have to get away from here now!"_

_He held onto her, looking at her frantic optics._

"_Why? What happened?"_

"_I… I knocked out Galvatron!"_

_He released her._

"_You hurt our leader?"_

_She looked at Soundwave._

"_He… He's not my father… He's something else! He hurt me!"_

_Soundwave grabbed her arm and made way for the hangar._

"_What happened?"_

_Mariamus looked at him, trying to say it. A nauseating feeling rose in her gut as she thought of it._

"_He forced himself on me… He kissed me."_

_Soundwave punched in the code to the shuttle and prepped it for take-off. He stopped when he realized what she had said._

"_What?"_

"_Help me, Soundwave… If you really care about me... help me."_

_Soundwave stared at her for the longest time, she could see the battle raging inside him. Should he obey his commander, or protect his love. He finally turned back to the console and punched in the launch codes._

"_Thank you…" She whispered._

_Soundwave led her to her private shuttle and turned to her as the platform lowered._

"_Thanks you, Soundwave… I… I know it isn't easy for you, and I won't ask you to come with me… I know you don't wish to."_

_He nodded slowly, pulling off his face mask._

"_My place is here… But thank you, Mariamus Prime. You are the only femme I have ever considered worthy of my… my…"_

"…_Love?"_

_He nodded again before he pulled her into a kiss. He watched her as she boarded the shuttle and took off._

_Mariamus took one last look at Cybertron before she fired up the rockets and her home disappeared behind her._

"Do you know what happened to Soundwave?"

"No… I stayed on my own; I floated around in space for a long while… I visited a few planets, helped out rebuilding a few colonies that had been affected by our war. Even though you Autobots kept your search for Energon on Earth, the Decepticons didn't. Multiple worlds were torn apart from our search for Energon."

"Your search?"

"What? You think I lived with the Decepticons for that many years without changing from my innocent Autobot ways? I do not have this insignia on my chest for nothing."

"Maria…?"


	12. Decepticon ways…

**Chapter 12:**

**Decepticon ways…**

"_Decepticons! Attack!"_

_The women and children of the village ran screaming, running behind the front lines where a myriad of warriors stood ready with their swords and spears._

_Mariamus moved forward, armed with her blasters. The organic four armed humanoids were almost the same size as them, but poorly armed._

_Mariamus blasted a few of the warriors out of her path before she threw her blasters into subspace and gathered her Energon sword. She crossed swords with the chieftain, and he growled at her in a coarse language._

"_Me'hak kartan!"_

_She understood it as a threat to leave their energy crystals alone. Mariamus already knew that they were sacred to the people._

"_Do not worry; we'll leave as soon as we've gotten the crystals."_

_Mariamus jumped back as the chieftain raised his sword. Mariamus spun and slashed her energon sword across his chest, making him fall back. He was dead before he hit the ground._

"You murdered him?"

"Of course… It was either me or him. I think, what you mean to ask is whether or not I felt any remorse about it."

Jazz nodded slowly.

"I didn't…"

Jazz stood up.

"What did you steal in Optimus' office?"

Mariamus looked down.

"What? Mariamus… Rodimus and Magnus will let you sit here till you rot for all they care! You mean nothing to them! They don't know you, Magnus hates your guts and has tried to drop hints to Rodimus about having you disabled for good. There's only a few of us oldies who have threatened to leave if they do so."

Mariamus looked up, her optics flaring a little as she digested the information he had given her.

"You… You've threatened to leave if they…"

"Of course we have! By Primus, what did you expect? You're Prime's daughter. We were all sad to see you go. You've proven your worth to me, by telling me you didn't join the war effort against us…"

"Does it not bother you that I am Megatron's daughter? Not just adopted, but his real daughter?"

Jazz shook his head.

"No… To me, to all of us really, you will always be Maria…"

Mariamus turned around with a noise that almost sounded like a strangled sob. She waved him off.

"Maria?"

"Go away…"

She listened to Jazz as he left the room, the metallic door locking behind him. She opened the diary again, reading the last page.

_I have uploaded these data to my workstation in case she should find them… I don't know how many of us will survive this… All I know is that Megatron must be stopped… even if it means losing my daughter… I hope she will forgive me, but I must stop him… this has gone on for far too long._

_I hope Maria grows stronger from this… She must… Even with all that has happened. She is still my daughter. She is a Prime._


	13. Matrix of wisdom

**Chapter 13:**

**Matrix of wisdom.**

Maria shut off her optics. She had indeed grown stronger… She had become much stronger.

_The shuttle hummed quietly, almost lulling her off to sleep as the same stars seemed to pass her shuttle. Restless, she had flown for months without aim. She had almost dozed off when a bright flash blinded her, shaking her shuttle violently. For a moment, she was sure the whole shuttle would explode, ending her misery. _

"_Awaken… Mariamus Prime."_

_Maria looked up, and in the middle of the bright flash, a figure was slowly exposed. His golden frame shining in the bright light._

"_You are restless youngling. You think you have no home."_

"_Who are you?" She demanded._

_The golden figure just smiled to her._

"_You will know when I have left."_

_He moved closer, taking her hands._

"_You know where your home is. But your pride is keeping you from returning. You will travel more, rebuild what you have broken. And this will help you."_

_He put his hand on her chest and she could feel a warm glow spreading inside her._

"_Goodbye, Mariamus Prime."_

_Mariamus woke up on the floor of her shuttle. She looked around finding no signs of the abrupt explosion she had felt. She turned her head a bit when she heard a faint whisper. It took her a few moments to realize that the whisper didn't exist in her audio receptors, but inside her…_

_She opened her chest plate and pulled out what the figure had given her, and it became clear to her who she had spoken to._

"_Primus…"_

_She had only seen Optimus' matrix on few occasions, but she recognized this as a different type. Optimus' matrix had been filled with a blue, shimmering, crystal- like substance. This one only had a small shimmer in the middle, floating inside the round capsule. Mariamus knew what it was she was supposed to do._

_Primus had told her that she would still be traveling when he had left… to repair what she had broken. She had to fill this Matrix… The Matrix of Wisdom._

_Mariamus put the gift back in her chest and plotted the course for the closest planet she had helped destroy…_

_When she was done... she would return home… home to earth._


	14. Completion…

**Chapter 14:**

**Completion…**

Mariamus woke up by a painful jab in her arm. Magnus was holding on to her, trying to rip open her data panel. Mariamus grabbed onto him and threw him into the electric bars to her cell. Someone at the control panel had foreseen this and the bars were turned off before Magnus hit them. Mariamus got to her feet and towered over him.

"I told you not to touch me."

She stepped back and watched Magnus get up and out of the cell, muttering something about insane Decepticons. Mariamus just grinned, watching Rodimus standing in the room, watching her.

"Why won't you tell us what you stole?"

Mariamus got up and stepped over to the bars.

"Because what I stole was never meant for your optics."

"What was it?"

Mariamus turned away, pacing the room a bit.

"Alright… I will tell you, but I will not show you. Like I said, it was only meant for his eyes and mine. After that it's up for you to decide if you want to keep me locked up here, disable me or let me go…"

Rodimus looked at Magnus and Kup, then back at Mariamus with a slow nod.

"It was his diary to me…"

"His diary to you? Why would he want to write a diary to you? You abandoned him!"

Mariamus snarled at Rodimus.

"How would I know. I came here expecting to find nothing, and what I found was between him and me. I didn't hack his computer, I already knew the password. He never changed his password… Why do you think he didn't?"

Rodimus stood silent for a little while.

"I… I guess you are right. But how can we be sure that it really is what you are telling us?"

Mariamus stood still.

"You can't. You'll just have to trust my word. Besides, I have no use of your schemes of grandeur, your energon plans or your battle specs. Even the map to the biggest energon supply in the universe couldn't stop Galvatron from tearing me limb from limb the first second he sees me again. I am only a Decepticon by blood now. I have redeemed myself with Primus, and all I came here to do was to see if Optimus would even see me again. Naturally, he couldn't. And neither could Ratchet."

"What does he have to do with this?"

Magnus cleared his throat.

"They were completors."

Mariamus shook her head.

"No…"

Magnus looked at her again.

"What do you mean? You just said…"

"I said we were lovers… I never said we were completors."

"You've never completed?"

Mariamus laughed out loud.

"Of course I have. Soundwave was my first completor."

"Soundwave?"

"Yes…"

_Mariamus was stacking up the energon cubes that had been gathered in the latest raid. She heard the door open and close, heavy foot steps coming closer. She turned her head, watching Soundwave coming closer._

"_Hello Soundwave… What brings you here?"_

_He looked around, checking to see if she had any companions._

"_Are you alone?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Good."_

_He turned her around, wrapping his arms around her waist. Mariamus grinned and gave him a kiss on the face plate. _

"_Have you finished loading the Energon?"_

"_Yes. Do you have some free time?"_

_His grip around her waist tightened._

"_Yes. How would you like to spend it?"_

_She ran a finger down his nose._

"_My, my… What are you…"_

_She stopped, feeling like she was being pulled into him by some unknown force. Almost like her air was knocked out of her, and her feet swept away under her. She gasped, backing out of his arms, but was stopped when he grabbed her hands, holding them tight._

"_Stop… Don't run."_

"_Wh…What just happened?"_

"_You have what?"_

"_Your daughter and I have recognized. We wish for your permission to complete."_

_Megatron leaned back in his seat, watching Mariamus and Soundwave with a look she couldn't decipher._

"_Soundwave. After this, what… liberties do you think you will take with my daughter?"_

_Soundwave looked directly at Megatron._

"_My position has not changed. We just wish to complete to avoid any losses in resources."_

_Megatron watched them with a mild interest and Mariamus stood still, trying to figure out if he had caught the duplicitous answer._

"_You have my permission to complete…"_

_Soundwave nodded and Mariamus turned and walked out with him._

"_Soundwave?"_

_He turned, looking at his commander._

"_Yes, Megatron?"_

"_Don't abuse my trust…"_

_Soundwave nodded again and left._

"Did he ever find out?"

"I think he had his suspicions, but he never voiced them. Either he knew and accepted it, or he didn't know about us."

Rodimus turned and walked out. Ultra Magnus waited a few moments before he followed him. Mariamus watched them leave, contemplating if they would let her go. She knew both of them didn't feel too fondly of her, but how deep did their Autobot sense of right and wrong reach? Would they let her go, or disable her? With every word she had spoken to them, she was inclined to believe the latter would be the case.


	15. The truth

**Chapter 15:**

**The truth.**

It seemed like weeks passed before someone came by again. This time, it was both the face of a stranger and someone she knew.

"Who are you?"

The red Autobot sat down in front of her cell and smiled.

"I'm Hot Rod… You've only seen me as Rodimus, so I can understand why you're confused."

"Gave up the mantle?"

"Yes. I gave it to someone who deserved it more than I. Someone better."

"I hope you don't mean Ultra Fungus."

"…Magnus…"

"That's what I said."

He actually laughed, which made Mariamus confused. Rodimus seemed to have been the depressed type, someone who had to grow up too fast for his own liking. Now he seemed back in his right track…

"No, not Ultra Magnus. I need you to tell me something though…"

"Yes?"

"Why did you leave?"

Mariamus leaned back, crossing her arms.

"When we discovered who my father was, I wanted to know why he abandoned me. I only remembered fractions of my time there, but I do remember that Megatron, as much as you would doubt it, is a good father. When I was a child, I brought out the best in him, and I wanted to know if I could change him for the better… I never voiced it to Optimus when I was human, but when I became a transformer…"

"Yes?"

"I decided to seek his permission to do it."

"No… He didn't."

"_You want to what?"_

"_I want to switch sides for a while. I need to know if I can change him… I have a chance, I know!"_

"_No! I will not let you go to him and try to change him. You may be his child, but I have known him for millions of years, and Megatron is a purebred Decepticon, there is no way you or anyone will ever change him."_

"_But…"_

"…_No! I will not say this again. You are not getting my permission to do this!"_

"_Then it's a good thing I don't need your permission! I'm old enough to be able to make my own decisions."_

"_Mariamus!"_

_She stood up, grabbing a hold of the Autobot insignia on her chest. She tore it off and threw it on the desk in front of him._

"_This is my decision. You can either support me or not, but you can't stop me."_

_Optimus stared at the insignia on the desk for a long time before his optics returned to hers._

"_No…"_

_Mariamus turned around._

"_Fine… Have it your way!"_

_Optimus stood up, pointing at her, his tone taking on a dark threatening pitch._

"_If you walk out of that door, don't come back. Because if you leave, you're no longer my child!"_

_Mariamus stopped, and for a moment Optimus held his breath, hoping that had made her stop. She looked over her shoulder at him, her optics dark blue like the night sky._

"_I haven't been a child for a long time!"_

_She opened the door and slammed it after her. She didn't see Optimus fall back into his chair, his expression one of pain. He sat there for a while before her got up and stormed out of the office, racing through the city toward the hangar. She didn't hear him calling after her as the engines fired up, drowning out his plea._

"_Maria! Don't leave like this! I'll give you my permission…Stay…"_

"Harsh…"

"It's in my blood."

"Maybe it isn't. Maybe you're just rotten to the core. Maybe you just like being evil…"

Mariamus got up and stepped closer to the bars.

"Do not test me, I can hit you with a force you have never seen before. I can easily wipe your self-righteous smile off your face. You do not know me, and you will never understand the complexity of my life."

Hot Rod stood up and walked over to her.

"I know you well enough to know that you're a threat, and you should have been disabled the moment you set foot in Autobot City! You betrayed the Autobots and Optimus! You've forgotten what it is like to be one of us, and you can never return to what you once were!"

Mariamus growled, her arms rising from her sides, her optics flaming.

"I would keep my mouth shut if I were you! You have no knowledge of me other than what I have allowed you to hear, while I can easily draw every single bit of information I need from you!"

"I don't care! Whatever you do, you will still have betrayed and forgotten about Optimus and there's not a single thing you can do to change that!"

Mariamus roared, blue fire emitting from her optics and her chest lighting up before the chest plate flew open, bathing the room in a blue light. Hot Rod was knocked up against the wall, the blue light blinding him for a moment. When his vision returned, Mariamus was floating above the ground, an energon sword in her hand. It looked like she was covered in blue flames. Hot Rod gasped as he saw the Matrix sitting in her chest.

"How.. How?"

Mariamus hissed at him, malice thick on her voice.

"You think you know so much, you who have felt the power of the Matrix of leadership. A Matrix of strength and power! You, with all your knowledge could never fathom the true power of Wisdom! The strongest of warriors can never overpower the one who can outsmart him! This matrix is filled with wisdom, power of the mind and therefore power of the body! Test me and I will show you the color of failure!"

Hot Rod was frozen against the wall, trying to understand what was happening to him. He could feel her voice inside his head, mixed with a thousand whispers, things he could not comprehend. She was adding all his thoughts and feelings to her matrix in one shot, taking everything he ever knew and adding it to herself. He closed his optics and screamed before the room became black.

When he woke up again, he was slumped against the wall. Mariamus was sitting on the floor, her eyes shining a comfortable glow on him in the otherwise dark room.

"What… What did you do to me?"

"You already know. You just won't accept it. I have barely accepted it myself. I can, at any time swipe the mind of any living thing and add their knowledge to my own. I have more knowledge of the universe than someone as old as Kup. But of course, if I lose the Matrix, I will lose the knowledge as well."

Hot Rod felt strange. He felt rested and comfortable almost as if he had been recharged. He sat still for a long while, didn't want to talk. When the silence was finally broken, it was Mariamus who spoke.

"All these years, he has been in my mind every hour, every minute, every second of the day. And he hated me, I know he must have hated me.. I thought I could come back and ask for forgiveness. I always thought we would make amends some day. I just want to know if he could have ever forgiven me for what I did to him!"

Hot Rod nodded slowly as she continued.

"I came back to ask him if I could be forgiven. And he was dead… Not one single bit of knowledge in my matrix could undo that. That is… unless you want to meddle with the Quintessons, which of course is always a bad idea."

Hot Rod rubbed his face.

"What would you say to him if he were here?"

Her optics dimmed, darkening the room.

"I'm sorry…"

The lights returned in a flash, bathing the room in a dull fluorescent glow.

"I know… And I forgive you."

Mariamus turned her head to the door, seeing Optimus standing there. He looked as if he was smiling. Mariamus got to her feet and crossed the broken bars, making her way over to him. He opened his arms and she moved into them, her arms wrapping around him.

"Thank you…"

"You're welcome… Always welcome."


	16. Parting again

The feeling of his arms around her shoulders brought her a strange mixture of joy and sorrow. She held him tighter, not wanting to let go. She shook her head slightly, her optics shutting down as her Matrix whispered to his. So many things she wanted to say to him, and yet with all her wisdom, she couldn't find any other words than the same few, repeated over and over again.

"I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!"

He gently motioned her back, but it was as if her strength had left her. She dropped to her knees, , curling together on the floor in front of him. She wanted his forgiveness, but even with him willing to give her that, she couldn't accept it. She had done too much harm. All the wisdom she had gathered, the planets she had helped rebuilt. None of that changed how much harm she had done. Optimus grabbed onto her, pulling her back on her feet. She pushed away from him and took a few steps back, she regained her composure and took a few deep breaths, Optimus looked into her optics, knowing full well what she was about to say.

"I'm not ready for this… I thought I was. I…"

He just nodded, but she knew he was hurt. No, this wasn't something he could just love away. She wasn't the same. As much as she could have changed Megatron, he changed her the same way.

She looked at the others. Jazz held out his hands, as if he wanted to speak, but for once, his fast audio components failed him. She gave Optimus one more look before she headed for the door.

She walked out of Autobot City, searching for a place to take off from. She turned her head to look at Autobot City for the last time. She could see Optimus stand on one of the platforms, looking at her. He didn't have to say anything, This wasn't the same goodbye as last time. She knew he wouldn't shut her out.

Maybe he understood that he couldn't hold her back, and tightening his grip would only lead to a bigger struggle. Such sentimental nonsense, she thought. But it was true.


End file.
